Anger, anxiety, fear, loneliness, frustration, ill-health, poverty, environmental destruction, jealousy, homelessness, world hunger, lack of energy in our day.
These are all things we would rather “do away with” than “deal with”.
They are ugly. They are uncomfortable. They make us feel like something is very wrong.
But what happens when we give them a chance? Have we ever tried giving these things a chance? Whether they are a personal issue like lack of prosperity in our lives, or a global issue like lack of world peace, how often do we simply let these issues exist and go on with our lives.
So often, we feel an emotion we don’t like – say anger – and we go into a tailspin of “how do I make this go away?” Okay, “I tried breathing for ten minutes, that helped, but I’m still a little angry.” “I tried going for a walk, but that annoying person is still in my thoughts.” “I even prayed to god and gave an affirmation of gratitude, why is this anger not going away?”
Those of us who are “enlightened” know that negative emotions and negative trends in society need to dissolve if we want a better life on this planet. But how much time do we spend frustrated and angry over things we can’t control? On a global level, how often do we obsess over what this politician said or what that celebrity did. How much do we choose to focus on it, rather than allowing their stupidity to exist and getting on with our day.
The truth is, we allowed them to ruin our day. We allowed some external force to affect us in a negative way. We allowed a negative energy to strike a chord within us to create even more negativity in this world rather than positivity.
Imagine for a minute someone says to you, I don’t like something about you – be it your political beliefs, your choice of gender expression, or your choice of occupation and hobbies. Instead of getting mad at them, say “thank you” to them. Why resist what they have said and try to fight them. This person already doesn’t like you or what you believe in, so how can they be influenced by you or by someone they don’t agree with?
This makes sense. I believe that environmental destruction is not good, but someone who disagrees with me isn’t going to change their opinions just because I put up a good argument and cite facts to support it. They are going to fight, because they’ve been conditioned to believe that their beliefs are true and ours are wrong. They have their own news shows, their own blogs, and their own circle of friends that support their beliefs.
So, if you’ve followed me up till now, you can see that the solution is not to resist. The solution is to flow. If someone says something that you don’t like, you can say to yourself, “wow, that’s not what I believe, but okay”. You don’t have to fight with them, you don’t have to wrestle with their beliefs or your own beliefs, you can simply let go of the need to win the argument.
That is the essence of life. Letting go. When we hold on too tight, we miss the beauty of the moment and we begin to loose track of what’s really important. When we are too aggressive, we are simply showing others how conditioned we are to live in a miserable life condition. And when we show others how wrong they are, they only are filled with a greater sense of bitterness and antipathy.
So, my suggestion is – next time you see something you don’t like or encounter a troubling circumstance, see if there is any possibility of let-go. That is the first step. If you don’t let go, how can the light make it’s way into the room of your life? And if you don’t let-go, maybe you won’t learn something valuable like tolerance, or compassion or friendship.
How many friendships have been ruined because the two partners were so committed to their differences that they couldn’t see the agreement? How many arguments were blown so out of proportion that they took a mole hill and created a black hole, sucking in everyone and everything around them.
The trick is, we let whatever is in our life – be it an uncomfortable emotion or a troubling world event – exist without judgement. Of course we might not agree with what’s happening, but we say thank you because the circumstance is teaching us something valuable.
In the example given earlier, if a Republican says something to a Democrat and he or she doesn’t like it, the best response is simply “thank you”. If this thank you is sincere and heart felt, and not a fake way to avoid an argument, then the argument will be completely disarmed. The person who initiated the comment may be surprised that the statement they threw out was not met with some level of conflict. They may be surprised that the person didn’t put up a fight. In fact, if the person is reasonable, they may realize that their own comment was insensitive and acknowledge that. So letting go is a gift for you and the other person. It’s a selfless act because you are not letting the wounded or traumatized self be triggered by an external circumstance. This is the greatest gift you could give to yourself or anyone else.
Of course, be reasonable. If someone is looking for a fight and comes to you for that reason, simply tell them, “I’m not interested in discussing right now. Why don’t we grab a cup of coffee or find something else to talk about.” It’s magic.
Let this be your mantra for the day. “I choose to relax and allow anything which may be uncomfortable today to just be”. I might get triggered, and if I do, I allow the pain to wash away, like a hurricane passing through. It might leave damage and destruction. But I’m choosing to witness the storm rather than fighting it.
So enjoy your day and allow the bumps in the road to be bumps. They are uncomfortable when you ride over them, but the next moment you are on solid ground. There will be patches of bumpy road, but if you soften and flow, there is a beauty in the bumpy road. There arises an appreciation for the smooth road. There is a pattern in the road that might be enjoyable, if you allow it. We’ve been taught to avoid discomfort and fight for our comfort. There is an irony in fighting for our comfort, since fighting is usually uncomfortable for everyone involved. Why can’t we simply try to allow the discomfort to exist temporarily, and then allow the comfort to return on it’s own. It’s not so positive creating discomfort to achieve comfort that would naturally return later. This is important, but it’s difficult, since there are so few people who live this way.
Just enjoy the journey, you will find your peace when you let go and flow. No one will be able to take away your peace or your joy when you have no resistance to their actions or their words. You will be the watcher on the hills, witnessing the insanity of the world while you eat popcorn and enjoy the show.
I suggest allowing what exists to exist, and watch the beauty return, like flora and fauna returning to a land that was previously desolate and depleted. The animals and plants will slowly make their way back, even to the most polluted and the most desperate places on earth.
You can do it, allow the light within you to guide you and become a vessel for it’s expression. You can do it. I believe in you. Enjoy this life and all it has to offer.
I have more to say, but we will save it for next time
Blessings and Peace 🙂